Story Power

Blogging the Lit Life

Date: May 21, 2025

A Year of Literary Inspiration

Throughout my senior year, I’ve been exposed to numerous insightful and perspective-shifting novels by Bernie H, the one and only English extraordinaire.  The two literary works that inspired me the most were Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice and William Shakespeare’s The Tragedy of King Lear.

In past English classes, I’ve read other Shakespeare works, namely Hamlet and Romeo and Juliet, but The Tragedy of King Lear struck a personal chord with me. In the play, Lear is the aging patriarch of the royal family who is taken advantage of by his two eldest daughters, Goneril and Regan. They often mock his age, which only heightens their cruelty. Regan tells her father, “O, sir, you are old […] You should be ruled and led/ By some discretion that discerns your state/ Better than you yourself” [2.4.165-9]. The Bastard, Edmund, also sells his father out, resulting in his torture, exclaiming, “That which my father loses—no less than all. The younger rises when the old doth fall” [3.3.21-22]. These characters perceive age as a weakness and are rightfully seen as villains due to it. My own grandfather recently turned eighty years old and has unfortunately begun to have trouble with his memory. After reading about Lear, I recognized the importance of valuing the time you have with that person and in the moment, being understanding of any shortcomings due to age. Everyone will be old and die at some point. We should value our elders for their life experience and the wisdom they can pass down to us.

The novel that surprised me the most was Pride and Prejudice. I had heard of the book before, but only in the context of it being the original romance novel. Due to my own prejudice, I assumed that I would find it boring and unrelatable, but found the exact opposite to be true. Whether vainly or not, I couldn’t help growing to admire and feel more and more like Fitzwilliam Darcy, even if his first name is goofy. Mr. Darcy was largely misunderstood by just about everyone in Hertfordshire. Elizabeth and the other villagers perceived him as an arrogant elitist who only cared about riches and vanity. In reality, Mr. Darcy was just an introverted man, skeptical of opening up to people because he had been hurt before. A central theme of Pride and Prejudice that I try and live by is to not jump to conclusions and judge people merely on their surface level. This novel made me more aware of the intricacies in relationships and opened my mind to a new genre of novels and films to enjoy.

Thanks for all the recommendations Mr. Heidkamp, they weren’t half bad!

 

 

Once a Stranger

I died today.

Well I guess that’s not really true. At the very least, it’s quite misleading. See life, death, it’s all just a matter of perspective. It just depends where you’re looking from, and what the view is. From here, the view looks pretty damn amazing. I can see the flash of lightning, hear the crack of thunder, feel the air rushing past me, the rain against my face. Now this, this is the sensation that makes you forget where you are, what is happening, and crucially: who you were four hours ago. And that’s a good thing, because I really need to forget four hours ago. For the sake of the here and now, I wouldn’t be able to tell you what happened then. You know, because of the whole forgot who you were thing that I just said. But for the sake of the story, there’s so much you have to learn. 

See, the night before had ended in a way that I’m not quite proud of. I’m not entirely sure if I’ve had a night I’m proud of in the last couple of years. But this one was especially poor. After what felt like the longest of days and the most unfortunate of nights. I found myself with little to protect me from the rain but an overpass. And not a particularly well built one either. But it was the one I had chosen to find a bit of comfort from the cold and damp world and it was where I chose to pretend to sleep. I say that I was pretending to sleep because that allows me to believe that where I was was in my control and what I was doing was in my control. In actuality, I was trying to sleep, but I couldn’t. I’m gonna make a wild guess and say that it was probably the bridge, it can’t be my fault. I was up and walking at 4. Pretending gets harder when the thunder starts to mumble.

But the rain hadn’t begun to hit just yet and I didn’t care that it was obvious it was about to. That and the fact that bridges aren’t as waterproof as once thought. Anyways, I walked along the road. I think at this point it was LeSalle Boulevard, or was it Wayne? I was looking for a place to eat some breakfast. I had this craving for some eggs. Like the eggs that I had had when I was 10, back on the farm. I’ve still never had eggs that taste like that. It was about 5 by the time that I was able to find some semblance of civilization. Then it took me another 15 minutes to find the church. I figure a church has to have some food for the weak and weary even though I had never stepped foot into a church before. 

There was only one man in there. It seemed to me like he was whispering the sermon he would give later that night, which would make him the preacher. So I started a conversation with him. I asked him his name, “Lear,” he said. He looked to be on the older side, “91” was the answer when I asked him his age. And we began to talk. After about 15 minutes of talking, he offered me the breakfast that I had been looking for since I had woken up. But I didn’t want it anymore. In our conversation, I learned that he had cancer. The doctors had said that he had only a few months left to live. Now I had to learn how this man had come to terms with his life ending. I mean how can someone learn that they’re just going to stop living, allow everything to fade to black, and just stop being? Well that happens to everyone, but how could someone be okay with it?

I talked to the preacher for 2 more hours about his life. He told me about his daughters, his career, and his hobbies. I felt like this man’s life was flashing right in front of me. I learned about his love for fishing. He told me about all his great fishing stories- the bass, the marlin, the time that he spent a month straight on the boat. He had done everything he wanted and he disregarded the thoughts of society-something that I had not done yet, something I needed to do. I realized at that moment that I had somewhere to be. I thanked the preacher for the conversation and I told him that I had my own “fishing” stories to make, and I left.

 I walked for 40 minutes to find the plane. It was now pouring rain, the storm had become volatile. I had never flown it before, but I knew it was there and I knew there was something I had to do. I walked into the cockpit to find the plane running, which was quite convenient. It occurred to me that I had never flown a plane, but it was time for me to make a choice that I would remember. Somehow, I was able to start the plane, but the rain in front of me was blinding while I was on the ground, so I began to move forward. I just drove to speed up as much as I could, I just continued to speed up. And suddenly, I found myself in the air. The sound of the engine was deafening, the only thing that broke it up was the thunder above-the thunder that I was heading towards the source of. 

The plane continued to climb and the rain was no longer blocking my view. I looked down to see the beauty below. This was the life that I was looking for, the life that would allow me to die peacefully. See now, for those of you keeping track at home, it was 4 hours after the start of my day. This was the sensation and the feeling that allowed everything to fade away. But in a flash of light and one last mumble of thunder, the plane was split in two. It was a crash louder than I had ever heard and it was the brightest light that I had ever experienced in my life. I found it quite ironic that the brightest light was followed by such great darkness. This darkness was one that I could not see past. I found myself in the moment that I had dreaded and avoided my entire life. I spent my life incredibly scared of this, but here I was now, with no worries or doubts about my future. I was finally fulfilled.

In my mind I could see myself falling to my demise, but the darkness that filled my eyes remained. But this was my chance to finally open my eyes. And for one last second I was able to open my eyes and feel the ground approaching faster than I could possibly fathom.

How Literature Opened My Eyes To Others: Pride and Prejudice & The Stranger

Before reading Pride and Prejudice and The Stranger, my perception of others was really one-dimensional; I operated under the assumption that what you saw was what you got. If someone was quiet, they were just… quiet, and that was the end of it. This mindset meant I rarely went out of my way to connect with people (lol), especially if they didn’t immediately align with my expectations. As college approaches, I knew I needed to change this approach, but I wasn’t sure how. These two books, despite their huge differences, fundamentally altered my perspective, showing me that human interaction is far more complex than I ever realized.

Pride and Prejudice was the first to dismantle my simplistic views. I remember feeling intense frustration with Mr. Darcy’s initial arrogance, particularly his condescending behavior at the Meryton ball where he insulted Elizabeth. In real life, I would have immediately written him off as an insufferable, annoying jerk. However, as the book unfolded, I witnessed his transformation, spurred by his revealing letter and Elizabeth’s own evolving understanding. That moment when Elizebeth re-reads the letter and reevaluates her own judgements of both Darcy and Whickham was a stark revelation for me. It wasn’t just about the story; it was about my own tendency to make snap judgments and miss the deeper, complex motivations behind people’s actions.

When I reflected The Stranger, it was even more challenging, yet equally profound shift in my thinking. Meursault’s emotional detachments initially baffled me; I kept expecting him to display some human emotion or undergo a dramatic change of heart. He doesn’t. Yet, his indifference, rather than alienating me, forced me to question what “normal” emotions even are. I started to wonder how many times I might have dismissed someone as… odd when perhaps they were simply experiencing the world in a way I couldn’t grasp, or their struggles were internal and not outwardly expressed. The scene where Marie asks if he loves her, and he responds that it “doesn’t mean anything” was particularly impactful. It wasn’t necessarily that he felt nothing, but that his feelings didn’t conform to societal expectations. This realization will push me to approach new interactions in college with much greater openness. I understand now that being genuinely social isn’t about finding people who mirror me, but about engaging with the messy, multifaceted, and sometimes inexplicable inner lives of everyone I encounter.

Thank you so much for the wonderful year!

Lessons from the Literature of AP Lit

Before I started high school, I was always reading. I would read whenever I could get the chance and as soon as I finished a book, I would start a new one. Once I started high school, I was busier, and I read less and less. The books we have read this year have reignited my love for reading and I am so grateful for the class. The books that impacted me the most during the year were Pride and Prejudice and Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead. These books have all taught me important lessons about myself and life.

I had already read Pride and Prejudice before reading it in class and I loved it when I initially read it. Reading it again and being able to analyze it on a deeper level was an impactful experience. Not only did it transport me to a different world, it also reminded me to follow your heart. When Lady Catherine was questioning Elizabeth and insinuating that she and her family were not good enough, Elizabeth held her ground and stayed calm. When Lady Catherine questioned why her family did not have a governess, Elizabeth stated that her mother was perfectly capable of taking care of all of them. Additionally, Elizabeth defied societal standards twice when she refused to marry Mr. Collins and again when she refused to marry Mr. Darcy. Both marriages would have given her and her family financial stability but they were not going to make her happy. She put her happiness and her values before other’s expectations of her. This is something that I think is important for me to remember because it can be hard to say no to others but Pride and Prejudice has served as a reminder that it is always important to value my happiness and uphold my values.

Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead was another impactful book that we read during the year. Janina stood strongly for her beliefs and did what she could to make a difference. She was perceived by others as weird and crazy but she kept fighting for humane treatment of animals and an end to poaching. Even when she was dismissed by men in power because they thought she was just a crazy old woman, she continued to fight for her beliefs. She showed that having any type of impact is important and that it does not matter what others think of you. At times, it is hard for me to believe that my actions will have any real impact but her determination to make a change, even if it only affected her small village, showed me that even small change is good change.

Overall, the books we have read for AP Lit have been entertaining and kept me reading throughout the school year. If I hadn’t taken the class, I most likely would have made excuses that I was too busy to read, and I would have read a lot less. Therefore, I am truly grateful for the class and the lessons I have learned because of it.

The Czech Republic

Hopelessness is a quintessential human emotion. At some point in almost every person’s life everything will seem to fall apart around them and they will be left stranded, seemingly without hope. In their respective books, Janina and Meursault confront this reality, forced to live in and watch the progress of what they believe to be a cold and unfeeling human society. The ways in which they respond to this similar experience could not be more different. While Meursault chooses to embrace the absurd and revel in meaninglessness, Janina continues to carve out meaning, pursuing what she cares about with an almost religious zeal.

The most powerful expression of Meursault’s response to his situations comes at the end of the book, when he is confined in a cell awaiting his inevitable execution. Camus writes, “At that time, I often thought that if I had had to live in the trunk of a dead tree, with nothing to do but look up at the sky flowing overhead, little by little I would have gotten used to it.” His realization comes from the knowledge that when everything is stripped down, all situations and settings are equivalent. No matter whether we live in a small town in Poland or an estate in regency England, we will still feel the same human emotions and experience all of the same happiness and suffering. With this, he can feel a kind of ultimate contentment, realizing that because nothing he or anyone else does matters, he can be happy with a complete detachment from all physical objects, and await the final companionship of the crowd on his execution day.

Janina, though feeling a similar helplessness, decides to combat it more actively than Meursault. She knows that her actions will bring no change in the long run, but she decides to keep going because it is all that she knows how to do. Her end goal seems to be some sort of poorly-defined idyll, a perfect promised land that, for her, takes the form of the Czech Republic. I do not believe she thinks it will or can ever come to pass, but still she keeps killing hunters and burning down buildings. Her life will always have a clearly-defined meaning, even if she produces no clear progress or value. She may be miserable, but she is never lost. If Meursault is allowing himself to drift away from the world, she buries herself in it, allowing herself to become entangled in its poisoned roots.

When I encounter a world that seems hopeless, I hope that I can approach it similarly to Janina. Even if I understand that nothing I do matters, I can’t bear to detach myself from everything around me. I want to be able to do and act, and move toward some ever-further goal. Both Meursault and Janina watched a god die, but Janina decided to continue to worship, and this allows her to go on, as I hope I would too.

My AP English Lit Experience

Throughout the year, I have read some books that have disturbed me a little bit in the way the characters are written. One of these characters was Mersault from The Stranger by Albert Camus. At the start of the book, I thought he was a tiny bit boring, and I didn’t really see myself in his emotions and actions. But towards the end of the book, when he met the chaplain, I started to sense my own opinions on the world changing. I see myself looking at my actions like they don’t matter as much, not to the extent of the actions that Mersault did, but I still feel like I don’t have to worry about things. This can tie back to Mr. EVIL Heidkamp’s speech, where you can do whatever you want, and you are controlled by society’s actions. He went on about how you can go to school naked and do things that society wouldn’t respect because you can realistically do whatever you want. When I heard the speech, I thought he was crazy and spoke to friends about it, but when I finished The Stranger, I saw why he had that speech. Mersault really impacted me when he started to snap really impacted me. He didn’t give a care about what he said to the chaplain because he knew that at some point he was going to die.

The idea of fate has stuck with me throughout the class, and when we got to the romantic poetry unit, I saw a poem that felt like The Stranger. The poem was in Emily Dickinson’s poem Because I Could Not Stop for Death where it had a presence of death and fate. At the start of the poem, it talks about how death is a friendly person and waits for the author to get in the carriage. When I read it, it made me feel a little less scared of the idea of death, and it showed me that we all die at some point. It doesn’t matter if we wait till the day we turn old and die, or we don’t have a choice if we die or not, it always happens. This poem also made me think about my life so far and how I have to appreciate the things that I have done. I have so many experiences where they are revolved around me and are special to me and nobody else.

The sum of this all is that I think that reading has a special thing that can impact any of us. I am personally not a big reader, but sometimes these books hit me personally and can really change my perspective on the world and our actions.

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